You don’t need anything else. Do not try to "wow" them in the first sentence. Just give a rundown about the story in as few words as possible.
They will never send out a letter that reads: "Sorry, we can’t use the enclosed article, but I’m giving you an A for neatness." Yet, if you present your story or article in a professional manner--neat, no coffee or food stains, clean--no obvious spelling or grammatical errors, you will have a better chance of getting read. They know you are not perfect and there will probably be a mistake or two, editors understand and accept that, but when you consistently misspell words, make the same grammatical errors over and over, you don’t give them much choice.
When you send a clean copy, you put them in a better mood and they will be much more likely to read your work than toss it to the side. Make sure the letter is readable--your computer ink or ribbon should print in nice clean lines. If not, change it. There is no sense in sending a letter that is so dim the editor has to get a magnifying glass to read it, or one that has skewed in the printer that he or she has to practically turn it sideways to read it. If it isn’t as perfect as you can get it, don’t send it.
What any editor wants is the promise of a good read in that first paragraph. If you hook them, they’ll take the bait every time and lay the letter aside without reading another word and go straight to your story. And if it’s as good as you promised, then they’ll eventually get back to your cover letter and finish reading it. By this time, they couldn’t care less if you’ve been published or not. You wrote a good story, you were professional; so therefore, they’ll take a very close look at it and more than likely accept it for publication.
John Wood of Attention Grabbing Query’s and Cover Letters says, "I’ve known writers who have spent weeks or months getting a manuscript just right, then put only five minutes writing a cover letter that causes them to fall flat on their face."
To get your foot in the door, attention to detail is essential. A well-written cover letter may not ensure publication, but it is the key to standing out. And standing out will get you published.
